Living the dream

Grey Adams: Local artist. Native Tulsan. Five-year-old.

[Author’s note: This edition of Day Drinking is ultimately self-serving. This interview with my son is my Father’s Day gift to myself, and I thank my editor for indulging me.]

Place: The Phoenix
To Drink: Dead Armadillo (Beau), Cookie and an ice water (Grey)

The Tulsa Voice: So, you know any good jokes? 

Grey Adams: Yeah, I know a lot of ‘em.

TTV: Tell me a joke.

GA: Why can’t you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom?

TTV: I don’t know, why?

GA: Because the “P” is silent.

TTV: That’s pretty good. 

GA: It would also work for pteranodon.

TTV: I guess it would. Where were you born?

GA: I was born here in Tulsa, in a hospital in South Tulsa, I think.

TTV: And have you ever lived anywhere else?

GA: No, I’ve lived here my whole life. 

TTV: What are some of the jobs you think you might like to do when you get older?

GA: I’d like to do some kind of job with the word “ologist” in it. Like paleontologist, marine biologist, archaeologist—those kinds of things. 

TTV: That’s interesting. I think “ologist” means “the study of”—usually those people are some kind of scientist. What do you do for money right now?

GA: I have an allowance.

TTV: How do you earn it?

GA: I do a lot of jobs. I clear my plate from the table after I eat, I feed the dogs, I pick up my dirty clothes and put them in the hamper. Oh, and try not to fight with mom and dad.

TTV:  What subject do you like to study most at school?

GA: What does “subject” mean?

TTV: Like science, art, math, things like that.

GA: Well, I really like art. I like all kinds of art—drawing, painting, collage.

TTV: Why do you like art? Is it just because you’re good at it? Do you think you’d like it if you weren’t good at it?

GA: Well, yeah, I think I would still like it. I feel good when I do it.

TTV: Does it make you feel calm or excited?

GA: Mostly calm. I also like to study the master artists.

TTV: Like whom?

GA: Well, I’ve studied Marc Chagall, Georgia O’Keefe, Claude Monet, Mark Rothko, Jasper Johns, Jackson Pollack, Grandma Moses—

TTV: Do you have a favorite?

GA: Marc Chagall. I really like his stain glass windows.

TTV: You have any summer plans?

GA: Yes. I’m going to the beach—to Cape Cod. I’ve never been to the beach or even seen the ocean before. I hope we will see tide pools, and we will definitely see some crabs in there. We might see lobster boats and lobster traps. We’ll go swimming in the ocean. Oh, and we’re going to fly in some planes to get there.

TTV: Are you excited about that?

GA: Yes! I’ve been on a plane before, but I can’t remember it because I was a baby then.

TTV: Do you enjoy travel?

GA: Yes! Well, I love to see new things, if that’s what you mean.

TTV: Is there a place you’d like to travel that you haven’t seen yet?

GA: Yeah, I’ve only been to five different places so far. I want to go to Chicago to see “Sue,” the T. Rex, and I’d like to go to Europe.

TTV: What’s in Europe that you want to see?

GA: Lots of art.

TTV: What’s the meaning of life? What are humans here to do?

GA: The meaning of life is to survive.

TTV: Is that hard to do?

GA: Sometimes it really is. Human beings are really fragile and squishy. They don’t have exoskeletons like insects do. Like if you do something where you hurt your brain, it’s really hard to fix it. Even most doctors couldn’t fix a brain if it were hurt bad enough.

TTV: Did you just eat some cookie off of the floor?

GA: Yeah. I’ll stick to the cookie on my plate now.

TTV: Good thinking. What do you think your life will be like when you grow up?

GA: Well, I have a lot of things I want to do, but I don’t think I will have any kids.

TTV: Why not? 

GA: I don’t know, I just don’t feel like having any, maybe just one kid. If I had one kid, that would be fine.

TTV: Well, I think that as you grow older your feelings might change.

GA: Well, when kids are babies, they are a lot of work, and since I don’t want to have a wife, I think that would be a lot of work for me.

TTV: Wait, now you don’t want to have a wife? Why?

GA: I don’t know. It’s just how I feel.

TTV: Would you want to have a girlfriend?

GA: I guess so. I could go to the movies or go to dinner with her after I raised my baby.

TTV: Do you think much about the future?

GA: I’ve always thought: Is the future even real?

TTV: Ha! That’s a good question. What do you think?

GA: I’m asking you. 

TTV: Well, here’s what I think: Nothing is real except for right now. This very moment. It’s really all we ever have. Like right now, I’m reaching out and touching your hand and I’m looking into your eyes—this is real.

GA: Yeah. This is real life. But I do feel like I’m in a dream.

TTV: Always?

GA: Not always. But right now, because it’s, I don’t know, it’s too wonderful.

TTV: Let’s talk about Father’s Day. It’s coming up.

GA: I know. I need to go with mom to pick out a gift.

TTV: I don’t really need a gift.

GA: Why?

TTV: I don’t know. I just don’t need anything. I have everything that I need. You’re my gift. And I think you should really reconsider on the whole idea of being a father—it’s really just the sweetest thing. It’s changed my life for the better in every way.

GA: Okay, I’ll think about it. And I’m also going to live with you and mom my whole life.

TTV: You may rethink that as well.

GA: Nope, I’ve made up my mind.

For more Day Drinking, check out Beau's chats with director Matt Leach, yoga and meditation instructor Tom Tobias and attorney Dan Smolen.