Stand bi+ me

Celebrating Tulsa’s bisexual+ community

Sept. 23 is the 20th annual Celebrate Bisexuality Day, or Bi+ Visibility Day, dedicated to people who fall under the bi+ umbrella—a broad term for those who are attracted to more than one gender. And for the last five years, the bisexual+ community has been honoring the week surrounding Celebrate Bisexuality Day with a multitude of events nationwide. 

Daniel Clay, the organizer for Tulsa’s festivities, explained the importance of having events and spaces for the bi+ community. “People know what it means to be a gay man. People know what it means to be a lesbian,” Clay said. “Because the assumptions that so many of us are straight or gay, that you can’t be attracted to more than one gender, a lot of us just kind of go unnoticed—and because of that, the needs, the struggles that our community faces, often go unnoticed too.”

The sponsoring group for Tulsa’s Bi+ Visibility Day events, Brought to You Bi the Letter B (BTYBTLB), serves Tulsa’s bisexual, pansexual, fluid and queer communities—and on Sunday, Sept. 22, they’ll be serving flapjacks. Pancakes with Pansexuals is a chance for LGBTQ+ members and allies to learn more about the pan community and other identities that fall under the bi+ umbrella.

The celebration continues with Monday’s Mixer at the Dennis R. Neill Equality Center. The meet-and-greet is an opportunity to mingle with members of BTYBTLB and learn more about the resources available. The group meets on the second and fourth Monday of every month at the Equality Center.

“If people have problems they want to share, if they just want to chat about a movie they saw, we’re an open safe space for people who fall under that bi umbrella—bi, pansexual, fluid, queer, anybody that would fall under that umbrella,” Clay said. “We’re a space where we can talk nonjudgmentally and enjoy each others’ company.” Clay added the group is for people aged 18 and older. A teen group meets Saturdays at the Equality Center.

There’s another chance to mix and mingle on Thursday. The group is partnering up with Dead Armadillo Craft Brewing for happy hour. The taproom just down the street from the Equality Center has an outdoor area that’s kid- and dog-friendly. Live music starts at 7 p.m.

The finale of Bi+ Visibility celebrations comes Saturday at the Equality Center. The 4th annual Stand Bi+ Me party will include music, dancing, stories and refreshments. 

The goal, Clay said, is to be seen. “My number one challenge is getting the word out that our group exists and getting people to come participate in our events or even just come out of curiosity and show up to our support group,” he said. 

“We absolutely need a space for people to ask questions and share experiences and be in a place where they cannot be judged about not being sure if they’re gay or straight or trying to figure out what being ‘bi’ means,” Clay said. “That’s really important to me—that we have a space where people can come and safely ask those questions.”